I received this question from a reader recently:
Great blog full of practical information, thank you!
Given your medical/science background, do you have any health concerns regarding long-term retention? My wife’s previous schedule was a monthly ejaculation. We are gradually working on increasing the length between ejaculations to once or twice a year which I am in complete agreement with.
Are you aware of any health risks with such a long term schedule? I’m currently at almost three months and feel great so far. Thank you for your consideration.
I answered it in the comments section, but I thought it would be worth going into it with a little more detail. There really isn’t any consensus on this in the medical community, but there are some interesting studies to look at. However, different studies reach different conclusions which may just add to the confusion more than clarification on the issue.
Masturbation Frequency Linked to Prostate Risk in 20s, Protection in 50s
Polyxeni Dimitropoulou, PhD; Rosalind Eeles, PhD, FRCP; and Kenneth R. Muir, PhD, obtained detailed sexual histories from 840 men. About half the men developed prostate cancer by age 60, and about half did not have cancer.
This was a 2009 study that states frequent masturbation for men is 2-7 times a week for men in their 20-30s and increased the risk of prostate cancer compared to same age men masturbating less than once a month. These frequent masturbators had a 79% greater chance of prostate cancer by age 60.
For men in their 50s, frequent masturbation was defined as one or more times per week compared to same age men that reported never masturbating. These 50 year old masturbators had a 70% less chance of prostate cancer.
One of the things that really stood out to me was the article stated:
“The findings were surprising. Sexual intercourse did not affect prostate cancer risk. But frequent masturbation did — in different ways, at different times of life.”
I thought this was fascinating just from a spiritual Taoist perspective. The union between the Yoni and Lingam would be a totally different flow of energy than masturbation. It’s interesting to see this aspect reflected in the science. I’ve noticed that extensive pre-climax stimulation to my husband’s penis with my hands causes blue balls whereas extensive pre-climax stimulation with my vagina does not. My husband doesn’t want to experiment with increasing the validity of this observation by replicating it repeatedly.
Dimitropoulou, now at England’s University of Cambridge
“It is kind of logical that a moderate level of masturbatory activity has to be maintained,” she says. “Not too much, and not none at all.”
“In mature age, it may be more important that toxins get flushed out of the system,” she says. “And because the masturbation frequency was not as high in the men’s 50s as it was in their 20s, even low levels of masturbation in the 50s has a protective effect.”
These are just theories, Dimitropoulou warns. More research is needed to determine the exact role of sex hormones and sexual activity in prostate-cancer risk at different stages of life.
In conflict with the above study, we have the earlier 2003, 2004 studies below.
Harvard’s Health Professionals Follow-up Study
As part of Harvard’s Health Professionals Follow-up Study, 29,342 men between the ages of 46 and 81 reported their average number of ejaculations per month in young adulthood (ages 20–29), in mid-life (ages 40–49), and also in the most recent year. Ejaculations included, nocturnal emissions, sexual intercourse and masturbation. Researchers found that men who ejaculated 21 or more times a month enjoyed a 33% lower risk of prostate cancer compared with men who reported four to seven ejaculations a month throughout their lifetimes.
An Australian study of 2,338 men came to a similar conclusion. In all, men who averaged 4.6 to seven ejaculations a week were 36% less likely to be diagnosed with prostate cancer before the age of 70 than men who ejaculated less than 2.3 times a week on average. The study found no connection between prostate cancer and the number of sex partners. (An earlier study, however, found that men who had sex with 30 or more women were two to three times more likely to develop prostate cancer than men with only one partner.)
But researchers stress that until more is known about the role of ejaculation and prostate cancer, researchers say men shouldn’t change their sexual behavior. “This one study doesn’t warrant any recommendations. Men shouldn’t go out and start changing their habits,” says Leitzmann.
There are many variables involved and too many internals of these studies for me to look at here. I wouldn’t read too much into these studies. No one knows enough yet, and I’m not sure any of these studies relates at all to my husband as he is an individual that is living a radically different lifestyle than those men polled in these studies. He is a highly stimulated male engaged in mind shattering sex almost daily without ejaculation except for about once a week. Science isn’t likely to find a large population of such males to conduct a thirty year study on. He has gone from low volume, clear watery bitter ejaculate from frequent ejaculation to a high volume, creamy, thick, mostly neutral tasting white ejaculate with heavy stimulation and infrequent ejaculation. The above studies also neglect to mention that testosterone increases after 7 days of retention which is a very significant benefit for men that are low in testosterone. He also supplements with Zinc after ejaculation. They also neglect to focus on what may be the true benefit. Is it the sexual stimulation or the ejaculation?
NoFap
If you look at the NoFap community on YouTube and their forum where men have pledged to not masturbate, you’ll find many testimonials from men about how much their lives have improved from not indulging.
The men in these videos below seem balanced and centered. YouTube videos you might want to view:
Semen Retention & NoFap – Powerful Benefits Note: Not working, private video
Sex & NoFap – 4 months without cumming
After 3 years of not masturbating – 11 tips Note: Video not available
This is really something the reader will have to search out and find what the right answer is for them. The medical research available all has to be taken with a grain of salt too. It recently came to light that at least 50% of the research published is invalid because the studies aren’t reproducible with the same results. Shocking! And statistics can really give us inaccurate perspectives depending on how they are used and worded. At a recent medical conference I attended, a presenter stated smoking doubles your risk of lung cancer but then broke it down and explained what this means. What isn’t commonly known is that 5% of non smokers develop lung cancer, and 10% of smokers develop lung cancer. Yes, that’s double the risk, but I still bet your surprised that only 10% of smokers get lung cancer. You really need to take apart every study and look at the raw numbers. And, yes, you should absolutely stop smoking! 🙂
Sources
Masturbation Frequency Linked to Prostate Risk in 20s, Protection in 50s
Does frequent ejaculation help ward off prostate cancer?
NoFap – Men committed to no masturbation
DISCLAIMER: This blog depicts the loving consensual agreed upon relationship between the author and her husband. Every relationship should be safe, sane and consensual. Anything else is illegal. This blog is not meant to substitute for your personal due diligence and is not to be taken as medical advice.
24 comments:
Anonymous
Wednesday, November 23, 2016
Tganks for your accurate researh.Frequent ejaculation is really bad for health and dangerous.I Support Nofap. Really intresting topic.
Yoga Girl
Thursday, November 24, 2016
Just to be clear, the article I presented is uncertain about the health aspects of frequent ejaculation. Researchers aren’t making any recommendations. People need to do theirown research and decide what’s best for them.
Thanks for Reading!
Proud Servant
Thursday, November 24, 2016
Yoga Girl,
Thank you so much for your blog/booklet. I saw your comment last week on Strict Juiie’s blog and I came over here and read every word, start to finish. I am truly impressed, Yoga Girl. You have laid out a compelling vision of ideal female/male relations. Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts, your research, and the intimate details of your life with your now-submissive husband.
I do have some questions for you, if you don’t mind. They’re about social aspects of your marriage.
You mention that you do a companion inventory regularly. Could you give us more information about this, please? Do you use a set list of topics or questions? Is it an instrument you got from someone else, or is it something you developed yourselves? Do you initiate and lead this process?
How did your husband transition to being a house husband? I assume he used to have a career, maybe a high-powered one. Did this transition happen naturally when you implemented the program of semen retention, ejaculation schedule, and consequences for unauthorized ejaculation? Did you just tell him it was what you wanted, or was it more involved than that? And how thorough a house husband is he? How much of the housework does he do?
Does your husband still have opportunities to be an alpha, out in the world?
Thank you for your time and for your thoughts, Yoga Girl.
Yoga Girl
Thursday, November 24, 2016
“You mention that you do a companion inventory regularly. Could you give us more information about this, please? Do you use a set list of topics or questions? Is it an instrument you got from someone else, or is it something you developed yourselves? Do you initiate and lead this process?”
It’s not a set list of questions. It’s a set time put aside each week (We need to do better at this) where each party can voice how they think things are going. Each partner generally starts off with what’s positive about each other. I like to know if I’m meeting his needs, and he likes to know if he’s meeting mine which is pretty obvious from our intercourse sessions anyway. These meetings can be short or longer. But I think they are essential especially at the beginning of making a change like this in your relationship. I’m sure we didn’t invent this process. Surely, marriage counselors must recommend something like this. Couples should devise their own means of open communication, learn to be a better listener and structure the meeting so it serves them best.
For instance, finding the agreed upon consequences for unauthorized ejaculation. He stated he would like to try contact punishment. I wasn’t really that into it in the beginning so that was a compromise for me. I stated that if we did that, it would need to be severe enough that it wouldn’t be arousing to meet the standard of being aversive. He agreed. So, I think it’s crucial in the beginning so one party isn’t off to the side harboring resentment. There are things to talk about. He’s not ejaculating as much as would like or he’s encouraging me that it’s okay to let myself go as far as discipline goes. That’s good to know as I now feel free to embrace Lilith completely without feeling like I should restrain myself. As he retains, he wants me to take out whatever I’m feeling on him. He respects strength and the quality of mercilessness in a woman. It’s good for me to know that, and I have a partner that will embrace it. I want to know what he thinks. There are things that are quickly becoming non-negotiable like going back to the way things were. It’s obvious our marriage is greatly improved, and this is going to cease being a trial and become permanent fairly soon.
“How did your husband transition to being a house husband? I assume he used to have a career, maybe a high-powered one. Did this transition happen naturally when you implemented the program of semen retention, ejaculation schedule, and consequences for unauthorized ejaculation? Did you just tell him it was what you wanted, or was it more involved than that? And how thorough a house husband is he? How much of the housework does he do?”
Well, it’s all a matter of money. I simply out earn him. I’m fortunate to have a very lucrative profession and provide a very good living for us. So we live where it suits my career and accommodates our lifestyle. He takes care of all of the household duties. Cleaning is really the least of them. There’s maintenance, bills, cars etc
Does your husband still have opportunities to be an alpha, out in the world?
Oh yes, He will always be Alpha as he relates to other males. It’s who he is. It’s also important to stress that frequency of ejaculation can greatly influence this aspect of his personality. I think it’s possible to do this and have a relationship where there is merely greatly increased passion, and a couple can function as near equals. It’s just that the wife is regulating frequency of ejaculation. Our relationship is always in flux.
Thanks for reading.
~Namaste
Proud Servant
Thursday, November 24, 2016
Thank you, Yoga Girl.
I find it interesting that when you and your husband do your companion inventory you sit it a chair and he is on the floor and he washes your feet. Do you take other measures to emphasize the difference in status between you? Does the difference in status carry over to interactions you have outside your home?
And it seems that you always have you have orgasms in sets of 9. Why such regularity? Aren’t there times when 7 orgasms feels right, or 12, or some other number? Does the number 9 have some special meaning to you?
Thank you for all your writing, Yoga Girl.
Yoga Girl
Friday, November 25, 2016
“Do you take other measures to emphasize the difference in status between you?”
Not really.
“Does the difference in status carry over to interactions you have outside your home?”
Outside the home we function as a fairly normal couple.
“And it seems that you always have you have orgasms in sets of 9. Why such regularity? Aren’t there times when 7 orgasms feels right, or 12, or some other number? Does the number 9 have some special meaning to you?”
I can have orgasm after orgasm as I don’t really have a refractory period. My stopping point could just be physical exhaustion. I have gone as high as 50 orgasms, but it’s taxing. There just needs to be a point of stopping, and it helps if I know when we start there’s only going to be nine and that’s the end … or maybe 18 or rarely 27.
I choose the number 9 because it’s a sacred number in sacred geometry. It’s the Universal number and number of spiritual awakening and enlightenment. It is the number of humanitarianism, and I feel this blog in it’s own way helps my husband and I be in service to humanity and hopefully will awaken some to the importance and need for female energy which has been out of balance for too long, and it’s just fun. It is the only number that always adds up to itself. For example 9 X 7 = 63, and if you separate the digits in 63 and add them up 6 + 3 = 9. You can take any number no matter how big such as 18546723 and instantly know that it’s divisible by 9 just by looking at it and adding up the numbers.
Much more in depth on the number 9 here:
http://numerology-thenumbersandtheirmeanings.blogspot.com/2011/05/number-9.html
Proud Servant
Friday, November 25, 2016
Thank you, Yoga Girl, for explaining how the number 9 has special meaning for you. With this understanding, having orgasms in multiples of 9 puts your sexual practice into a larger context. And I read in the linked article that 9 is the number of leadership. How very appropriate.
I hope these next questions aren’t too personal. I understand you might not want to answer, and of course I would completely accept that. But you have been so forthcoming in your blog, with so many intimate details, that I am emboldened to ask.
Do you tease your husband sexually, aside from when you want intercourse? You mentioned that he will get hard just being in the same room with you when you are fully clothed. So maybe he’s in a constant state of being teased, aside from the time when he’s post-ejaculation. I’m wondering if you do anything more overt.
I recall that your husband ejaculates when you give him permission by saying, “You may release your load now.” How sweet! Do you also stimulate his penis directly, or is your voice alone enough to make him ejaculate? Is he allowed to touch his penis after he ejaculates, or press it against you? Most men crave gentle, reassuring contact at this very vulnerable time.
Thank you, Yoga Girl.
Yoga Girl
Friday, November 25, 2016
“Do you tease your husband sexually, aside from when you want intercourse? You mentioned that he will get hard just being in the same room with you when you are fully clothed. So maybe he’s in a constant state of being teased, aside from the time when he’s post-ejaculation. I’m wondering if you do anything more overt.”
As he experiences daily stimulation without ejaculation, his penis responds much more easily to any potentially arousing stimulus. I’m not sure I would call it teasing, but he will get a major hard on even if he hears my toilet flush in my master bedroom in the morning signalling I’m awake and sex might be near, or if he hear the click of the door handle to the french doors in the dining room by the kitchen in the morning which is close to his bedroom. If he’s lucky I will often use that opportunity to take 9. Ideally, I think a husband should always be yearning for passionate sex with his wife. This is not the case for wives that give sex and ejaculation on demand. This system fixes that for the most part.
“I recall that your husband ejaculates when you give him permission by saying, “You may release your load now.” How sweet! Do you also stimulate his penis directly, or is your voice alone enough to make him ejaculate? Is he allowed to touch his penis after he ejaculates, or press it against you? Most men crave gentle, reassuring contact at this very vulnerable time.”
His is penis is always inside me thrusting when I give the command, so it’s being stimulated. His release is always associated with my voice and that command. When I say it, his release is always immediate. He’s just released so he’s not really interested in further stimulation. I like to see it so he pulls out and sprays me with it. I’ll usually inspect his ejaculate and determine how long it will be until his next release. If it’s bitter, he can count on 7 or longer days until his next release. I think I go into detail on this in chap 2. It’s not really a sex thing, it’s just for his own good health. Practicing semen retention has changed the consistency of his ejaculate.
Awedbymywoman
Saturday, November 26, 2016
Yoga Girl,
Do you have any knowledge on how a vasectomy effects the semen retention process, for good or for bad?
I ask because I haven’t had one yet, but am thinking about getting one here in the not too distant future. I’m curious how getting one may or may not change things, based on your personal experience or knowledge.
Yoga Girl
Saturday, November 26, 2016
I’m not sure how it would effect semen retention, but I don’t believe it should make much difference. There has been some concern of a risk in rare instances of men having lower testosterone levels who get a vasectomy.
You can check out this link for more information:
https://www.menshormonalhealth.com/vasectomy-testosterone.html
From TCT:
http://tctmed.com/vasectomy-and-low-testosterone/
“Still, our clinical experience has shown that vasectomy and low testosterone may be linked—vasectomy, or it’s subsequent complication, could possibly cause low testosterone. We have seen multiple patients who have noticed some of the symptoms of low testosterone after a vasectomy.”
“Although it is quite unlikely that your testosterone levels will drop because of a vasectomy, based on our clinical experience, we would say it is a possibility.”
I have a hunch that if this is really happening to some men, that the culprit is actually the introduction of a viral infection during the procedure that would cause the low testosterone. This would be like going to the hospital for an appendectomy and accidentally picking up an infection. It is very rare but does happen on rare occasions despite the best efforts to avoid it. Fighting a chronic viral or bacterial infection can use up resources that would have gone into the production of testosterone and wipes out testosterone levels like nothing else I know.
Research shows that one of the benefits of semen retention is raising testosterone at 6-7 days. So in theory, semen retention could be helpful for any man who had a vasectomy to help raise testosterone naturally.
Proud Servant
Sunday, November 27, 2016
How wonderful for you, that your husband gets very erect just from knowing you’re awake. Sounds like he’s ready pretty much whenever you want him. He, on the other hand, doesn’t know if you’re going to want sex in a few minutes, or a few hours, or not until the end of the day. Sounds like he’s often in that place of delicious torment, even when you’re not having sex.
And when you decide you want sex, is your yoni also ready, even without conventional foreplay? You two are so tuned into each other, I wouldn’t be surprised if you could go pretty directly to union,
Thank you, Yoga Girl.
Yoga Girl
Sunday, November 27, 2016
He’s not always ready. He does have many things that occupy head space. I wouldn’t say it’s like I could snap my fingers and say let’s go right now all the time. But if he’s not hard it only take a very short period of time with some light fondling, and he’s at full mast. Before semen retention, I would have to work on it for quite awhile and even then it might be only partially hard and he wouldn’t be very aroused.
It’s not like I’m horny all the time. Many times I have sex, and I’m not in the mood, but I approach it in the same way I approach yoga or meditation and at the same level of importance. There are many health benefits to arousal and orgasms for a woman which I’ve stated elsewhere. Having regular sex takes the same discipline as a workout. I try to make time for it almost daily. I may not be horny at the beginning, but as I go, I get very aroused. If I waited until I was horny to have sex, intercourse would be much rarer than it is.
I never have conventional foreplay. I just get his penis wet, insert it and start riding. I guess his thrusting is foreplay to the orgasm.
Thanks for reading.
Anonymous
Sunday, November 27, 2016
HI Yoga Girl What are health benefits to arousal and orgasms for a women, and daily stimulation? Don’t you like cuddling and caressing. during sex? Thanks
Yoga Girl
Sunday, November 27, 2016
“What are health benefits to arousal and orgasms for a women, and daily stimulation?”
There are longevity hormones that flood a woman’s body with orgasm. Cuddling and contact is really all part of this and certainly has many benefits. There isn’t a lot that is fully known and understood about this metaphysical process of transformation. I have no doubt that science will support this notion in the future. For more information, I suggest looking into the rituals of the Egyptian priestesses and the term Isis sex magic.
According to a study at Wilkes University, having sex one or two times a week boosts your immune system.
Orgasms release the chemical oxytocin, which then gives you a flood of endorphins. Those endorphins can reduce pain
One study found that people who reported having sex four times a week looked about 10 years younger than they were.
“Don’t you like cuddling and caressing during sex?”
Yes, I do. I hope I didn’t give the impression otherwise.
Anonymous
Wednesday, November 30, 2016
You definitely gave the impression otherwise.
It sounds like you angrily demand your nine orgasms, mount him, get yourself off, piss in his mouth and leave.
Yoga Girl
Wednesday, November 30, 2016
There is no anger. Just imagine the same thing but from a zen perspective. We love each other very much. There is very intimate kissing between my orgasms. I do have to leave when I’m finished though, or he would cling to me all day. He can remain rock hard for 20 minutes after I’m finished. It’s not conducive to him moving on with his day if I stay. It does need to come to an end, and we need to move on to other activities. But his day will come maybe not today but next week.
juliesp
Wednesday, November 30, 2016
Hi!
It’s all so fascinating. I just posted a blog article regarding your blog to help get the word out. The post also contains a lovely little story from your commenter above that I am sure you will enjoy.
Keep up the great work!
Initially I was concerned that I might be “the enemy”, as I write my blog to be highly titilating to men, and it of course encourages masturbation as a result. But I see that masturbation per se is not a problem. Masturbating to my blog and edging themselves right to the brink is acceptable, even encouraged. Especially if they are single or do not have an enlightened partner. But then they must not spill, except according to a schedule, correct?
I can understand why this would be much more difficult without a strong woman enforcing the schedule and demanding accountability, but perhaps some men with very strong commitment and self-discipline could achieve it? Especially if they self-administer aversive stimulus after they err? What are your thoughts re the single male in this regard?
Yoga Girl
Wednesday, November 30, 2016
Thanks so much for the kind review. It’s very appreciated. I’m glad you find the material interesting. Thanks also to Proud Servant.
“Masturbating to my blog and edging themselves right to the brink is acceptable, even encouraged. Especially if they are single or do not have an enlightened partner. But then they must not spill, except according to a schedule, correct?”
I always struggle giving single men advice. I think masturbating/edging is a very different energy than what happens when edging a penis in union between Lingam and Yoni. If there is edging and this single male is getting blue balls, it might be unproductive. I’ve manipulated my husbands penis edging him with my hand, and he gets blue balls, but doesn’t get blue balls when I’m using my third hand (Yoni/vagina). I think the Tao has an explanation for this but medical science doesn’t. It’s just a different energy flow. I think single men need to find what’s right for them. I think masturbating to orgasm 1-2 times a week could be okay. It’s hard to give a blanket statement. I think age is a big factor. Younger men can get away with more frequent ejaculation than older men. They should explore the NoFap community and learn from other single men experimenting in this area. But your right, sexual stimulation in general is a good thing, but men should separate sexual stimulation from ejaculation. Sexual stimulation and ejaculation are very much married to each other in the western male culture. They should be viewed separately and for different purposes. I really view draining my husband as more of a weekly maintenance issue as ejaculation for him really has nothing to do with our intercourse 99% of the time. Our passion is much more intense without it. My husband can read your blog, but certainly not play with himself while reading. He should take that energy and pour it into me during our session.
“I can understand why this would be much more difficult without a strong woman enforcing the schedule and demanding accountability, but perhaps some men with very strong commitment and self-discipline could achieve it?”
Yes, I think this was and is the case for some men …certainly not mine. My husband would give in as he rides so close to emission. It helps him tremendously to have consequences for spilling. There are some men that pursue Tantra and avoid ejaculation or orgasm and prevent spilling by using a pressure technique which I believe can be damaging and would never recommend it. They say a man may eventually orgasm and just not ejaculate. It could take years for this to happen. I think in centuries past it was the macho cultural thing for males to pursue this but obviously not in our current western culture.
“Especially if they self-administer aversive stimulus after they err? What are your thoughts re the single male in this regard?”
I’ve never thought of a single many applying an aversive stimulus to himself. I’ve always thought of it in terms of a couple’s relationship with the woman assisting the man. I would hope they will at some point find a female energy to balance them out. Maybe practice NoFap, become a centered, balanced male that women will be drawn to. Hopefully a woman that will read my blog, understand his needs and who she is as a daughter of Lilith.
Anonymous
Wednesday, November 30, 2016
Hi,
We practice semen retention in our marriage, usually for a set period of time. I am on the submissive side and holding back on orgasms does seem to spike my submissive feelings toward my wife. I thank her over and over when I finally get permission to ejaculate, and she might say something like, “poor boy” or “wow you were really turned on” or “you must have been frustrated.” We both love it. I do eventually get a full orgasm, and treat my wife really well.
Except for the fact that I often kiss her feet, we don’t do much else in the way of carrying on in a dom/sub manner. Work and decisions are shared, but I know she has certain expectations for me.
Yoga Girl
Thursday, December 01, 2016
Sounds like a great relationship. Thanks for sharing!
Anonymous
Wednesday, December 07, 2016
Thank you. Of course we originally thought of this as orgasm denial and control, but perhaps that can accomplish the same thing in many cases. We both love our secret and my wife loves that we are more intimate and happy. I don’t mind tolerating some frustration, which I usually work off on the job or doing chores which keeps me occupied.
Chris Bellows
Sunday, December 04, 2016
Good Stuff. I have added your offerings to my blog list. Keeping posting.
Yoga Girl
Sunday, December 04, 2016
Thanks so much, Chris!
Yoga Girl
Sunday, December 04, 2016
I’ve added you to my blog list, Chris. Thanks
This is one of a few blogs that were published by Yoga Girl at her website at http://flr101.blogspot.com. This site is now offline but all credit goes to her.
I’m 51. Masturbating at least once a week is considered frequent? Oh man, I usually masturbate 2 or 3 times per week as well as having sex with my Wife. I hope this will cancel out the chronic masturbation I did when I was younger!
My girlfriend has been edging me every morning and every night now for a month we made a bet and I’m not going to loose I’m supposed to get to cum on my birthday next month I was wondering if that long of edging could hurt me but I found the answers I wanted thank you all I’ll say it’s getting tougher every day