Is it wrong? Bad? Should I feel guilty?

Hi @vikter,

I'm happy to contribute to the building of chastity ?

More seriously, I love this community of serious people who don't fantasize about chastity as a feminine maneuver to rule the world (which as we all know is already ruled by cats anyway) but only as a way to make their couple tend towards more harmony.

@ruined-julie

This is why we have a dog. 

Chastity is as chastity does.  Everyone has their thing and I say more power to them.  For my Mistress Wife and I, I am in 24/7/365 chastity ... only without a device.  In other words, I am strictly prohibited from touching or pleasuring myself always, unless I have instructed to do so for her viewing pleasure, or I have been given authorization to do so, and always under her supervision.  I am not required to wear a device because over the years I have earned her trust that I do not and will touch myself without authorization.  Now, I am only required the cage as punishment and usually only when Mistress is particularly displeased with me.  

All that said, I am still absolutely chaste ... always.  How does know if i cheat?  Well, she trusts me.  In the beginning I would be tested by randomly having to produce an erection in her presence on on facetime.  She knows that if I had recently masturbated, that producing an erection would be difficult.  Since masturbating is akin to adultery in our marriage ... I just don't do it.

Hi @subhubphx,

 
I read your note with interest, and it raised a few questions to me.

First of all I have a lot of respect for men practicing chastity on the system of honor, even if it is absolutely not what attracts me (but all tastes are in nature).
I find that you are the respect and trust of your wife, however I am, how can I say, surprised by her method of control ?

I think I know men well enough to say that even after masturbation, they are quite capable of being erect with a minimum of stimulation once their refractory period has passed (let's say between 10 and 30 minutes).
That being said, I am not questioning your honor.

I also read that masturbation is equated with adultery in your marriage ? Does this also apply to female masturbation ?

@ruined-julie

First, let me say that I really enjoy your comments and contributions to this marvelous website and blog.  So thank you for replying to my comment.

Her method of control (honor system) is something that has evolved over time.  It was clear early on that masturbation was absolutely prohibited and when we first started out, the first thing we bought was a chastity cage.  She soon came to the conclusion that although the symbolism of me wearing it was outstanding, and was a constant reminder of her dominance over me, in actuality she found that it was inconvenient for her use.  She wanted to have instant access to my genitals be it for inspection, teasing, light cbt, grabbing, pulling, etc.  The cage simply made those activities that she enjoyed too inconvenient.  Plus, she wanted to be able to randomly summon me from another room, have me remove my pants, and masturbate for viewing pleasure.  She really enjoys that.  As such, she determined that I will remain completely chaste and her expectation would be that she could trust me not to violate this most scared rule without the use of a locked cage.  She still considers herself my keyholder ... and she is.

Not all men are gifted with the ability to have such a short refractory period.  Sure, some men can.  I was one of those men when I was a teenager and I my 20's.  Be that as it may, in the end, it is a matter of her trust in me that I would not violate her sacred rule.  Knock on wood ... so far I have been able to resist the desire to touch myself sexually or even masturbate.  It's something I'm pretty proud of in fact.  

As far as the masturbation being akin to adultery ... in our marriage it does not also apply to Mistress K.  We are living a loving Wife Led Marriage wherein she is control of all aspects of my sex and sexual activity, and of course she is free to do as she pleases with her own sex.  The term "female masturbation" is a broad term, but in the context of our marriage, she can do whatever she deems necessary to get her own sexual pleasure, including masturbation, with or without my knowledge.  For others, I suppose it is up to them to place their own significance on the importance of whether or not to abstain from masturbation as it relates to cheating.  I would imagine that a relationship where the man is Dom and the female is submissive, it very well could to apply in the context of their relationship.  To each their own so to speak.

Thank you again for your comments and questions.  I really do appreciate you mentioning that you weren't questioning my honor.