FAQs


Will it make his penis shrink?

Yes! His penis may shrink over time due to not being able to fully engorge itself. The Corpus Cavernosa fills with blood and allows the penis to become erect. Limiting the penis’s ability to become erect in a cage will prevent it from being able to maintain its ability to fully engorge itself when aroused. While it won’t prevent the man from getting erect, the penis will appear smaller when flaccid and when erect. A couple good cageless nights will restore it to its former glory as the penis is able to fully engorge itself with blood. There is no evidence of permanent penis shrinkage due to chastity cages. If you want to prevent this, just allow him to sleep cageless once every week or two.

Why would a man want his penis locked up?

Allowing someone to help guide him to positive behavior is simply accepting help in an area that by your very nature is weak. If he can allow his wife to guide him in this one area, the entire relationship will glow. He needs her strength after their lovemaking sessions to ensure that he stays true to his agreement with her. Although different and strange to some, there should be nothing humiliating and emasculating here. The man is putting his wife first and allowing her a level of sexual enjoyment that other women would beg for. I wrote a blog that you might enjoy called What Kind of Man.

Why would a woman want to keep a man’s penis locked up?

I can’t even begin to count the reasons. Click here for a few but I have lots of reasons throughout this site.

How much does it cost?

A custom cage can be hundreds of dollars or a cheap one can be found for under ten dollars. I typically recommend that you start with the inexpensive cages to figure out what you like. If this turns into a long term thing for you and your partner then you can look at spending more money. If you were new to skiing, I would suggest that you buy cheap skis at first to see if skiing is right for you and then buy more expensive skis when you decide to go professional.

How long can someone stay locked up?

Permanent lockup is a thing but I would start with a few days and wouldn’t recommend going more than a month. I’ve got some more information on the topic here.

Are there any medical concerns?

A properly fitted cage should not be uncomfortable or present any medical concerns. If the cage has spikes or anything designed to cause pain to prevent erections or removal of the penis, it could potentially cause some damage. If you are concerned, remove the device and seek medical attention.

Will he still be able to get erections?

Erections are still possible but they are confined to the size of the cage that he is wearing. When erections happen, it will feel very snug and perhaps slightly uncomfortable until the erection subsides. After a few weeks, the body will limit the amount of erections that happen but they will never go away completely.

How do I convince my partner to lock me up?

I get lots of requests for this but I don’t think that I can help here. Share the blog with your partner and perhaps share what you think lockup would accomplish for your relationship but I wouldn’t recommend going beyond that. If he or she didn’t take to the idea the first time, try again in a few months if you wish. If you come on too strong, it will likely never be something that is a good fit for your relationship.

How do I convince my partner to let me lock him up?

I would recommend sharing this blog with him and explaining your reasoning behind wanting to do this. You may want to improve communication, , increase control in your relationship, increase the amount of touch/massage, have some help around the house, want to do something different or you may be tired of his masturbation habits. No matter the rationale behind your decision to lock him up, there are lots of reasons why this is a great way to take control back. Most men will agree to be locked up when presented with a rational argument and can clearly see how a cage will solve a relationship challenge.

How do I know what the right size cage is?

This one is tough. I know of couples that have purchased ten or twenty cages to try and find one that fits perfectly. I highly recommend that you purchase one with multiple sizes of scrotal rings and if the device is offered in multiple sizes, opt for the larger. You can always buy a smaller one if necessary. Check out the recommendations page for some options that have my seal of approval.

How do I choose a cage?

This one is tough. I know of couples that have purchased ten or twenty cages to try and find one that fits perfectly. I highly recommend that you purchase one with multiple sizes of scrotal rings and if the device is offered in multiple sizes, opt for the larger. You can always buy a smaller one if necessary. Check out the recommendations page for some options that have my seal of approval.

How long does it take to get used to wearing a cock cage?

Having never worn one due to the particular equipment that I’ve got, I can’t really speak to this. From what I’ve heard from those equipped with cage-able equipment, it takes about 6-8 hours to get used to having it there. After 24-48 hours it should feel far less awkward. By the 5th day it will feel weird and like something is missing if removed. But… we don’t want to remove it, do we?

Will everyone see the giant bulge in my pants?

Probably not. If you wear tight pants with a big visible lock on top, people might take notice. More than likely, you are far more conscious of it than they will be. I’d suggest a cage that points the penis downward and has an embedded lock mechanism to prevent noise and odd shapes under your pants. The Chinese ones are typically cheap so you may need to buy a few before you find the right fit for your particular apparatus and clothing style.

Can I do all of my normal activities?

Walk through metal detectors? This is really going to depend on the types of activities that you are looking to do. Give it a try if you think it is safe with the cage and report back. If you have fears about metal or plastic cages, try using a silicon one which will flex and bend with more strenuous movements.

Is there anything I won’t be able to do with the cage locked on?

Walk through metal detectors? This is really going to depend on the types of activities that you are looking to do. Give it a try if you think it is safe with the cage and report back. If you have fears about metal or plastic cages, try using a silicon one which will flex and bend with more strenuous movements.

What kind of maintenance should I do?

I would suggest cleaning yourself daily just like you did before you were locked up. This will be much easier for circumcised men since there are fewer nooks and crannies. If you notice an odor, you might request that it be allowed to be removed for cleaning. I don’t really like the look of an uncircumcised penis so I haven’t dated any guys equipped with one so I cannot really speak to this. No offense to the intact guys out there. Just a personal preference.

How do I prevent chafing?

Petroleum Jelly or Bag Balm seem to be the most common in the chastity community. Eventually your body will get used to the cage and the chafing will go away. Use whatever products you need for your comfort in the meantime.

Which is better, metal or plastic?

This is really a matter of personal preference. Plastic looks more feminine and submissive while metal looks more masculine. Metal is easier to clean and heavier which might make him feel more secure. If you use petroleum jelly frequently for your comfort, you might find that it eats away or causes discoloration with the plastic/resin cages.

Does having a cage locked on make me less of a man?

A real man isn’t defined by his penis he is defined by his actions. A real man is a good husband, a good father, a good person. Allowing someone to help guide him to positive behavior is simply accepting help in an area that by your very nature is weak. If he can allow his wife to guide him in this one area, the entire relationship will glow. He needs her strength after their lovemaking sessions to ensure that he stays true to his agreement with her. Although different and strange to some, there should be nothing humiliating and emasculating here. The man is putting his wife first and allowing her a level of sexual enjoyment that other women would beg for. I wrote a blog that you might enjoy called What Kind of Man.

The cage is too painful. Should I take it off?

You poor thing. A property fitted cage should not be painful. If you experience pain around the scrotum, you might want to check the ring to ensure that you’ve got the correct size.

Try child birth or menstrual cramps and then tell me how uncomfortable you are. If you have medical concerns, you should remove the cage and see a doctor otherwise, I don’t think anyone really wants to hear about it.

I can’t sleep through the night with the cage. What should I do?

At night, a man’s penis becomes engorged with blood as a means of keeping it healthy. You may be familiar with the term morning wood. This is the penis stretching itself out and ensuring that it is functional and healthy. If the penis is confined in a cage it will certainly stretch out and become uncomfortable although no more uncomfortable during teasing or a daytime erection. Since nighttime erections are predictable, I highly recommend using Vaseline or Bag Balm around the base ring to help prevent chafing. This should ensure a good night sleep.

Many men report needing to wake up at 3 or 4 am every morning (depending on their sleep cycle) to urinate. That should relieve the erection and allow you to sleep through the rest of the night.

Which parts of chastity are fact and which parts are fantasy?

This is a really good question. Chastity is big in the fetish world and this site proposes a more practical approach to using a tool to manage your relationship. It is true that whomever owns the penis owns the man. If you take ownership of his penis, you take full ownership of decisions in the relationship. I would start with the blog entitled Taking The Reigns and see where that takes you. Only go as far as what you are comfortable with. Once you take him down this rabbit hole, they have a tendency to want to go full BDSM out of frustration. Only let it go as far as you want it to. After all, you are in charge.

Can cages cause erectile dysfunction?

There is no medical proof of cages causing erectile dysfunction. Mental health is another thing; however. Chastity causes lots of feelings and emotions that can certainly contribute to problems getting an erection. This is usually due to being self conscious or nervous after a long period of being locked up. Some men can become very nervous when in the presence of a strong and demanding female and that nervousness can lead to temporary erectile problems.

Can a reduction in orgasms lead to prostate problems for men?

Great question. I’ve heard a few different statistics about it and it has made me curious as well. So in regular Emma form I go out and research it until I am blue in the face. The short story is- there are lots of proven risk factors but lack of ejaculation doesn’t seem to be one of them.

I’ve seen some speculative links between prostate cancer and orgasm with surveys that try and link ejaculation frequency with prostate cancer. One of them even states that a man should ejaculate 4.7 times per week to have a 30% reduction in prostate cancer. Those surveys don’t take other factors into account such as age, health, weight etc.

They do say that ejaculating frequently clear carcinogenic substances from the testicles. Assuming that is the case, frequent teasing should be more than sufficient to keep things moving. A man who is denied and teased is almost always leaking, which proves that that sperm and hormone production is still in high gear.

Additionally, Semen is a fluid that is made from secretions from the seminal vesicles and secretions from the prostate. If the prostate is full, the man will stimulate his prostate when he defecates. This will release seminal fluid. There are other, more exciting ways of milking the prostate as well.

The short story is – the testicles will keep things flowing with enough stimulation and teasing. The prostate will milk itself during bowel movements as needed by the body. There may be some value in keeping high hormone levels and high levels of arousal, which I highly recommend as well. Don’t lock him and leave him, there are many reasons why that would be a recipe for disaster. Make sure that you check reputable medical information and if you find any studies that you think are reputable, feel free to post them here. Always defer to your doctor’s recommendation yada yada.