What do you think of when you masturbate? Sometimes I fantasize about an elaborate romantic fantasy usually in black and white like an old movie. Sometimes I imagine an intimate encounter with someone I recognize, sometimes with a past lover and other times with a complete stranger. When I'm short on time or especially determined to get there, I'll just focus on the pleasure and let my Hitachi Magic Wand take me away to another place. How about you?
According to this pair of articles on bustle.com it turns out that Men and Women have generally similar fantasies.
- A sexual situation involving their current partner.
- A sexual situation with a previous partner.
- Erotica seen online or via a mobile device.
- A sexual situation involving role play.
- A sexual situation involving BDSM.
- A sexual situation involving their current partner.
- A sexual situation with a previous partner.
- Erotica seen online or via a mobile device.
- A sexual situation involving BDSM.
- A sexual situation involving role play.
Number one seems incredibly healthy on both lists. Thinking about a sexual fantasy with your current partner. Absolutely! Think of the hottest time that you had sex or perhaps hotel sex during a vacation. I encourage you to share this with your partner! Share the details of your experience and the specific fantasy. Try and remember in the greatest amount of detail that you can. I keep thinking of the time that Kevin and I stayed in a local hotel and lounged around all day doing absolutely nothing. Nowhere to go, nothing to do. Just a simple getaway and opportunity to reconnect. All I can remember is both of us eating room service on the bed and the way his chest looked under the soft light of the sheer drapes.
How about number two, a sexual situation with a previous partner. Are you comfortable enough in your relationship to admit these fantasies to each other? Would you or your partner find this sexy or hurtful? If you find it hurtful, stop and analyze why it made you feel that way. Did you get jealous? Did her description of the previous partner make you feel insecure about yourself? Stop for a moment and focus on the specifics that made you feel uncomfortable. Would you consider sharing this experience in detail so your partner can enjoy the memory with you? Many couples feel a level of guilt when they find their mind drifting to a past partner but I suggest that you embrace it and share with each other. If the story causes feelings to come up, share those feelings and communicate together. …
