I am in my mid 40’s and have just recently read about the drastic change in the male body chemistry at orgasm. I’m really fascinated in this and want to learn more. Basically, as I understand it, there are three main chemicals swirling around in his body:
Dopamine (makes you feel good, makes things seem more interesting)
Oxytocin (generally the “love” chemical)
Prolactin (the “I don’t love you anymore “ chemical
When a man has an orgasm, prolactin skyrockets and dopamine drops, leaving a pretty harsh hangover.
I wonder... does testosterone also drop?
And, do ruined orgasms have the same effect, or do they leave the chemistry unchanged?
jc
It has been so long since I looked at this but I really did a deep dive into it for this blog. I don't want to misquote myself since I've now forgotten everything I wrote. Check it out!
Thank you, this is excellent, Emma. This is just so interesting. I mean it all makes perfect sense. I am finding that the more I am retaining, the better I feel overall. I have more energy and sex drive and I want to serve my wife wholeheartedly. This is a hell of a discovery. From a biochemical standpoint it is perfectly logical.
I am still wondering if ruined orgasms have an effect similar to an orgasm (I have yet to master milking). Further testing is required...
We don't do ruined orgasms as I do believe that an orgasm releases many of the same hormones as a regular orgasm. I'd rather completely withhold orgasm or give him a wonderful, pleasurable orgasm when he has earned it. There isn't much of any scientific differentiation or research on ruined orgasms so I can only go by personal experience of which I have very little.
Anyone?
Thank you, this is excellent, Emma. This is just so interesting. I mean it all makes perfect sense. I am finding that the more I am retaining, the better I feel overall. I have more energy and sex drive and I want to serve my wife wholeheartedly. This is a hell of a discovery. From a biochemical standpoint it is perfectly logical.
I am still wondering if ruined orgasms have an effect similar to an orgasm (I have yet to master milking). Further testing is required...
"Further testing is required" Too funny! I think we can all give you a big thanks for suffering in the name of science!
So much of all of this is related to the "Hawthorne Effect." Some might call it a placebo effect. Which equates to how people respond when they're being paid attention to. Ruined, not ruined...having someone interacting with you is a good thing (unless it's not wanted). The mind does amazing things to us all.
And yes...further testing is always required. ?
@patches
The mind does do amazing things to us. Some of it is psychological but much of it is chemical. It gets more interesting as we learn to separate them from each other.
@evolvingyourman_ivcr4j
Emma, I have found that the that after a ruined orgasm the desire remains very high but there is a somewhat of a feeling of satisfaction. Hard to describe, but definitely different. So in a way, you would be able to give the release but keep your Man tuned in.
For me it is the degree to which it is ruined. The best are when I am taken to the edge, but not over, and a little cum oozes out without any contractions - release without the pleasure or change in attitude.
I think what you are describing, @dplaything, is accurate for me, as well. It gets grey for me when I have a moderate ruined orgasm in that I don't feel that instant shift in my physiology, but later on don't feel as "on edge" and wanting to serve as I had been. All or nothing is probably the best policy, or at least limited to once a week, plus or minus.
If you look for 'Male Chastity-Pleasure and Devotion, the Science Behind It' on line you will find a piece by Kelmag from 2010 that is the most complete explanation of the male hormonal changes that I have read. There is a lot of discussion of the issue and Kelmag's paper on the Reuniting website, based on Marnia Robinson's book Cupid's Poisoned Arrow.' Neither deals with ruined orgasms, but that seems to be an inexact term.
Thank you for sharing. That piece is fantastic. I may re-publish that as a blog here (with proper attribution of course).
@evolvingyourman_ivcr4j
Thanks. A lot of the comments on Reuniting question the details of the chemistry, particularly the differences between males and females, but it is a good description. I think Kelmag is still active occasionally on Chastity Forums. I appreciate your blogs, esp the early 'Delayed Ejaculation' because it goes into the details of day to day management and the steps to take towards the goal, both halves of the couple being on the same team. Made me wish I was being managed like that even though DE has never been my problem. I loved the phrase 'carefully curated' in the Sexual Awakening and Religion blog.
