Male Sex Hormones
Here are some details about the sex hormones that make all of this so exciting:
We hear a lot about testosterone, and it is a huge thing in male bodies but the key players in this game are named Dopamine, Prolactin, and Oxytocin. Here is a simplistic picture of what those three are:
The intense pleasure hormone. A built-in reward system. The heroin of hormones. High highs followed by a deep crash.
(he wants this)
The “cuddle hormone.” It is what I was given to induce labor. It is involved in bonding, intimacy, trust, and maybe anxiety.
(you want this)
The satisfaction hormone. Like an antidote to the Dopamine & Oxytocin. It shuts down sex stuff.
(nobody wants this)
So now lets look at two patterns in terms of male bodies. The first is a regular “masturbate and have sex whenever I feel like it” pattern and the second is the tease and denial pattern. The “regular” pattern: orgasms on a regular basis. In this pattern Oxytocin builds up slowly in each cycle, then at orgasm a huge heroin rush of dopamine explodes his brain, and immediately it is all killed by Prolactin, so he instantly loses desire, intimate feelings, submissiveness, and trust. It then takes a few days or weeks to build those up again properly. The tease and denial pattern: no orgasms for longer periods, but CONSTANT teasing. In this pattern there are no big blasts of dopamine except for the occasional releases. Oxytocin builds up and stays high all the time, making him attentive and horny and affectionate and obedient and very eager to please the woman. The more teasing, the more Oxytocin! They have done experiments with suggestibility tests before and after doses of Oxytocin by nasal mist, and Oxytocin makes men up to 400% more open to taking and embracing the suggestions of their partner.
Below is a chart that displays the synergy of these hormones in the body of your man. In this example, the red spikes are the male orgasm nightmare and the low levels of accompanying Oxytocin. The male brain is conditioned to want this but as you can tell, this is a recipe for a poor relationship or marriage.
In this example, notice the steady increase of Dopamine followed by the drop during orgasm? The drop is triggered by Oxytocin that the body releases during orgasm. Oxytocin, when released during orgasm provides the post-sex sleep and cuddling that your man may exhibit. The goal is to get this love or cuddle hormone to persist throughout the relationship.
Can you imagine this steady increase of desire and devotion in your relationship? Even after Oxytocin levels in his body do not return as low as they do in the illustration above? This means that he doesn’t reset to zero, he resets to just about his halfway point. Note that this gradual Oxytocin increase will plateau the moment you stop or decrease teasing.
Oxytocin will also increase pair bonding in males. You will find that higher oxytocin levels will even help him keep his distance from females that he finds attractive.
Many scholars think that the second pattern is the more natural one. Cave men and cave women were struggling for food and survival and probably did not get to have sex all that often which worked out well because the man was a constant protector and helper of the woman, and did what she said. She was the level headed practical one so male obedience to the female helped the cave men survive. It is just the right thing and the way we are built to be. About emotions: some studies apparently say that Oxytocin can increase anxiety sometimes, which can cause men to become fidgety and very anxious. As he becomes anxious, he becomes more and more mentally dependent on me especially when his body is not used to higher levels of Oxytocin. What is the harm in that? He is anxious about keeping me happy, and he should be. It is like when you first fall in love and the other person makes you giddy all the time but you stress out about whether they feel the same or will stay with you. Remember every first date you went on? Giddiness and anxiety were caused by Oxytocin. It motivates you to be romantic and attentive and caring. By manipulating the hormone bodies in your man, you will give him the pleasure of constantly falling in love with you as he should naturally be doing. Some male dietary supplements will help to curtail Prolactin in the body to help stop both the Oxytocin and Dopamine levels from decreasing so dramatically.