How Do You Know If Your Man Masturbates Too Much?

My wife began this process at least ten years ago. It was very difficult initially as I was a chronic masturbator. Internet porn played a huge role in my habitual masturbation. My punishment spankings are typically done with me fully naked and over my wife's knees. She normally uses a wooden paddle. Sometimes I have to lay on the bed and she uses a leather belt on my backside. They vary in length and intensity. If I am on my best behavior, I can go several weeks without a spanking. There have been times though where I have been spanked several times in just one week - usually for failing to complete my chores on time and/or having a bad attitude and being disrespectful.  

Yes, I keep him panties all the time. It doesn’t do anything for me, but it keeps him in a more sub space. He is doing all the house work and the only way he gets edged or has an orgasm is like a female now. With a vibrator (on his cage) or receiving penetration. So I feel the panties fit the life he is living now.  

I give him 2-3 maintenance spanking a week. The weekend or end of the week one is when I’ll add the small infractions on after. If he gets a big infraction, such as disrespecting me, that comes as soon as I can. (We have kids) But those have become far and few. They have worked. 

The specific way that you explain this is very helpful. I never really considered how the frequency of ejaculation affects your day to day life. Many of the articles on your blog focus on the relationship aspect of this but I also wonder as a person who is not in a relationship, how this ejaculation/hormone balance issue impacts the way you approach the world in general. If you take two different cultures, Japan and Saudi Arabia you see the two extremes in not managing ejaculations properly. In Japan they are in a crisis because people are not establishing relationships due to social issues and technology. Men are constantly watching porn and masturbating thus causing them to not pursuit relationships at all. Then there is Saudi Arabia where masturbating goes against religious teachings and is frowned upon which seems to lead men in pursuing multiple wives and fathering many children as that is their only path to sexual release. Having a schedule like you discussed is such a great idea in preventing these extremes.

Posted by: @lbp6855

I never really considered how the frequency of ejaculation affects your day to day life. Many of the articles on your blog focus on the relationship aspect of this but I also wonder as a person who is not in a relationship, how this ejaculation/hormone balance issue impacts the way you approach the world in general.

The answer to this is is yes, frequency does make a difference, at least in my case. Too much and I feel listless, too infrequent and it gets so distracting I struggle to focus. There is an area in the middle where I feel most alive and alert.

There is another aspect to this. I was in a 9 year FLR that included chastity / orgasm retention. My wife was the type that liked to try things including several long stints of a year or so. What I found with those was the initial need to orgasm would peak and then drop to a sort of happy medium. It would go up and down a little but in all, it was a pretty good state. During these periods there was teasing and regular sex, I just didn't orgasm and on the occasion she wanted my cum, she would get it with prostate massage which would cause it to release with no contractions. It would just flow out.

I definitely feel frequency of orgasm is a great tool in moderating mood and states of being.

@brian What is your experience with sex without an orgasm? Or masturbation without orgasm? It seems like it would cause your brain to shut down and only focus on finding a way to have the orgasm, or maybe cause physical pain in the region perhaps. 

@lbp6855 Initially it started as a game or kink type thing, and initially it was weird and perhaps a bit painful because sex for me always ended in an orgasm as did masturbation so that is what my body expected.

After a while that changed as I started to really like not having the drop after orgasms. I also liked not loosing interest in my wife for a period after orgasm, as did she. Then there was the felt sense I had of her all the time because orgasming which was a huge part of my life was no longer under my control.

We also both worked form home and traveled a bunch together. For her, apart from the FLR aspect and a like of control, controlling my orgasm played a roll in us pretty much always getting along in day to day life. It just made things easy. 

She unfortunately passed from cancer, sucked ass that, but now that I have control of my orgasms again, while I do edge myself regularly, I don't orgasm much more than once a month or so. Like I said in the above post, I focus better if Im not orgasming all the time so its just normal now. No pain or anything.

@brian

Sorry for your loss, its must have hard not just losing the love of your life but also your guiding rock.

 You are one amzing and strong person.

@brian Thanks to her guidance and dedication, you are living as a better version of yourself instead of running around with your penis in hand like a kid at spring break on Daytona Beach. Her legacy lives on though your better life choices. 

I have found the guideline to appropriate ejaculation frequency for the male based on age to be quite helpful and am accepting the maximum frequency as a duty for me to follow.  This post has led to the removal of unrestricted releases for me and I believe will help me focus on Emma’s full rights to sexual gratification as she sees fit.

Posted by: @stephen-oxford

This post has led to the removal of unrestricted releases for me and I believe will help me focus on Emma’s full rights to sexual gratification as she sees fit.

Nice!

Posted by: @evolvingyourman_ivcr4j

Ask your man how much he masturbates and I think you will be very surprised. If he says anything less than once per day he is probably lying. Men should only cum once every 5-7 days (depending on age) and testosterone levels. Here is a very general guideline to help you find his correct level:…

if one minds what men say it's all a heap of lies. If one listens to them they never masturbate (aside from those who say they do but as an adjunct to regular sex, in this case they admit it just because it makes them pose as studs with such stamina that no amount of ladies may satisfy it lol), they never paid a professional service, they never had a failure in bed, they never took a blue pill, and they always dumped their exs. This narrative is so preposterous that one wonders how it can be believed. Ladies would hardly believe it, and males know it is utterly fake. How comes it is still vented is a mystery, and it would be reason enough already to warrant for a lady to take charge and bring some stern discipline into that mess!

Yeah you can pretty much guarantee they masturbate every day. 

@kirsten94 I used to. Then agreed to stop cold turkey. Now over a year and a half with zero total. That's a major impact on the brain, let me tell you ...

Posted by: @hotwifeaz

I had suspected my husband was masturbating a lot by his low semen levels on some days. Plus some days he wasn’t into as much as other days. I could also tell if he had been edging to porn prior to us having sex (If I gave him a HJ or BJ) by the forceful spurts. When he brought the idea of Chastity to me, I wasn’t excited about it and didn’t understand it, but I read some articles he gave me, which got me interested enough to start my own researching the subject. I had read an article very similar to this and definitely became very suspicious. So i agreed to try it. When we got to lock ups of 4-5 days, I saw him going a little crazy for release and when I gave in, wow, the amount of semen was so much greater. Now I was pretty sure of the answer, but I asked him, telling him he better be truthful from what I’ve already seen and suspected. I thought at worse every other day or maybe 3 days. He answered at least once a day. Oh boy I thought, I’ve got a problem here that I need to control and break. I was a little hurt and angry and I asked him, OMG, what is wrong with you? I decided then, yes we are doing this and told him he better find a comfortable cage, as we would be working towards long term lock ups. I did do more reading and research and found out my man really wasn’t much different than other men. But he is now, after almost 5 years of 24/7 Chastity, that habit has been stopped. He says the habit hasn’t been broken as he still feels the constant urge, but it sure has been stopped. 
I am a believer in Chastity and love it. 

Oh yes! Semen will tell you a lot about what he's doing. With my guy, it's thicker, whiter, and has more taste when he isn't masturbating. My husband put himself in chastity when we were dating because he was doing it so much he was damaging the dorsal nerve in his penis. He had moderate ED because he was fantasizing during masturbation and couldn't duplicate those fantasies in real life. So it was a physical and psychological problem. I wasn't on board with it at all. But, we only saw each other once a week and lived in separate homes, so I decided to let him do his thing and try to be supportive. Eventually, I had the keys in my hand. At that point he's not wanking during the week, and I noticed a big change in the quality of his semen and his orgasms (after his dorsal nerve had a little recovery time). My mouth and vagina were now the only source of his orgasms (the urologist said no manual stimulation until the nerve was completely healed)

Years later, we are married, still keeping him locked up anytime we are not having sex, and enjoying the best sex of our lives!

I'm definitely a fan!!

I've started testosterone replacement therapy, and my masturbation has gone up.  i think the only solution for this is chastity.