Like most of you, I enjoy oral sex. I mean, I really enjoy oral sex. Not just receiving but also giving. There are so many nuances to oral sex and it can be about dominance or can be an act of service or submission. I enjoy waking up and feeling a warm mouth on my nether-regions. I don’t always have an orgasm with oral sex and I don’t always want to have an orgasm with oral sex. The act of oral sex can be the culmination of that sexual encounter or it can be foreplay for a more penetrative subsequent experience.
I enjoy waking up to oral sex (who doesn’t, right?) but I don’t have the patience for more than a few minutes of it. When I wake I usually need to pee shortly thereafter and I don’t like to have an orgasm when I have to pee. They don’t feel good and I am too distracted by the pee sensation. Enough about pee, let’s get back to orgasms.
I mentioned above that I enjoy receiving oral sex but guess what. I also enjoy giving oral sex. A giver by nature, I enjoy kneeling before a guy and feeling his body tense and relax as I pleasure him. So many women expect to receive oral sex but don’t enjoy giving it. First off, they are crazy because oral is as much fun to give as it is to receive.
Is Oral Sex Submissive or Dominant?
I enjoy the dominance of oral sex. I enjoy holding the back of his head as he goes down on me. I enjoy walking through the door and aggressively pointing downward and saying “suck my pussy”. I even enjoy receiving blowjobs on a strapon. That last one I did to be silly but despite having no sensation in the dangly bit of rubber I enjoyed it immensely. The control of dominance in oral sex is an incredible feeling.
I don’t think that giving oral sex must necessarily be an inherently submissive act. Is there any difference between me saying “suck my pussy” and Kevin or Andrew saying “suck my dick”? I don’t think so.
For example, when I give blowjobs I usually feel like I am in control. His body yearning for my mouth, lurching as I take him into my mouth and into my throat. I hold the power of pleasure and pleasure can be a powerful force.
I’ve heard of guys who refuse to go down on me stating “real men don’t do that”. Good luck Mr. Macho man, let’s see how long that lasts. I’ve heard of girls that like to receive oral but are grossed out when it comes time for their turn to give. To those I say, get over yourself ladies!
Oral Sex Positions
Oral sex takes on so many different roles from facesitting to the famous sixty nine. Oral sex can be performed by both parties in bed, the shower and is arguably the easiest sex act to do in public. I’m going to focus this part on the oral sex positions that I enjoy receiving oral sex the most.
Let’s start with the standing position. Lie back against the wall or counter, push your pelvis out and have your partner drop to his knees. Use your hand behind his head to guide him to the right spot.
Another favorite is the as yet unnamed “from behind” position. Lie face down on the bed with pillows beneath your tummy so your bum is pushing out. Use your hand or a toy beneath you on your clit and let him kneel beside the bed or lay behind you and lick. The logistics of this one can be a bit weird but really enjoyable after some trial and error.
Oral Sex During Intercourse
This one is WON-DER-FUL although it does require that your partner be a contortionist or more realistically a third partner. While receiving penetrative sex, your partner provides oral attention to your clit. This can require a sexually confident/open partner since their face will be close to the action. The sensation is overwhelming, it is like using a toy on your clit during sex but you don’t have to concentrate on maneuvering it to all the right places. Not only does it empower your femininity with all of the energy on your nether regions but it feels absolutely incredible. One of the biggest turn-ons for me is to see two guys working together to see me receive pleasure.
Orgasms During Oral Sex
For boys, it really helps to have an established doctrine of what happens when ejaculation happens prior to the act itself. My personal preference is for that man nectar be delivered into my mouth but some don’t like the taste or consistency and would rather the precious cargo be deposited on their chest or face. Having the “where should it go” conversation is great pillow talk and also sets expectations that could put a damper on the whole situation if done improperly.
Ladies can be just as complicated with oral sex, if you are anything like me you are super sensitive during and after an orgasm. If he continues, it almost becomes ticklish (in a bad way). I had one partner who kept trying to stimulate me during orgasms even though I told him it was uncomfortable. I am not sure if he thought I was joking but not listening to your partner is a big turn off. Being the control freak that I am, I like placing a hand on the back of the head of a fella when he is down there. Some guys don’t enjoy this and it changes the dynamic of the act for them. Back to the dominant/submissive act paragraph above, I suppose.
Oral sex is wonderful. So, let’s talk about giving and receiving pleasure!