I’ve been married to Ryan for almost twenty years, and while we’ve always had a solid relationship, life’s stresses have taken a toll on our sexual connection. We’ve built a wonderful family with two teenagers, and managing the household alongside parenting has left me feeling overwhelmed. It’s impacted my desire for Ryan, and I’ve been searching for ways to reignite our intimacy. At the same time, I’ve been feeling a strong need to regain control over my life, especially in the bedroom.
For years, our dynamic was one of equals, and it worked well for us. But lately, I’ve felt an urge to take on a more dominant role with Ryan. I need to feel in control, to assert my power, especially when so many aspects of my life feel chaotic and out of my hands. Unfortunately, this new dynamic didn’t align with Ryan’s needs, and I started to wonder if our relationship had run its course.
One day, while searching for ways to reignite our intimacy, I came across the idea of cuckolding. At first, I was shocked, but the more I read, the more it appealed to me. The idea of having control, of “doing something to” rather than “doing something with” Ryan, filled a deep desire within me. It was a way to regain control and dominance in our relationship and our sex life.
Feeling nervous but determined, I brought up the idea to Ryan. We sat down and had a long, open conversation about it. I explained how I’d been feeling—stressed, overwhelmed, and in desperate need of control. I told him about the idea of cuckolding and how it might help me feel more empowered. Ryan listened carefully, and to my surprise, he was open to exploring it with me. He shared his own feelings and fantasies, and we realized that this could be something that might work for both of us.
We decided to take it slow and set clear boundaries. We talked about what we were comfortable with, what our limits were, and established safe words to ensure we both felt secure. This open communication was essential, ensuring that we both felt heard and respected.
We started gradually introducing cuckolding elements into our sex life. At first, it was just me flirting with other men in front of Ryan or sharing fantasies about him being with other people. Seeing his reaction to these scenarios was thrilling and empowering for me. It was as if a whole new world had opened up, giving me a sense of control and excitement I hadn’t felt in a long time.…
“The idea of having control, of “doing something to” rather than “doing something with” Ryan, filled a deep desire within me.”
“ Directing him to sexually submit to other men by means of bisexual acts and other ways makes him feel weak to me, rather than powerful and in control. Ryan always seems so in control of life, and I resent it because I often feel like I’m on a roller coaster of emotions, going after life fast and loose. This power dynamic, where I can make him feel vulnerable, helps balance our relationship in a way that fulfills us both.”
To me, it seems like revenge inspires her. How can that be healthily sustainable?
Is it revenge or is it simply a desire to tip the scales in the other direction temporarily? Only Fallon and potentially her therapist know for sure.
If I read it correctly, it doesn’t sound temporary. Some permanent things have taken place. But it ends with her saying they are good. So there you go.