This post is about understanding and treating ejaculatory disability/retarded ejaculation by conditioning the penis and male body to regain the ability to orgasm through sexual intercourse and oral stimulation. I've received quite a few emails from men suffering from delayed ejaculation and it seems male chastity may play a significant role in resolving this condition. For those unfamiliar with the condition, click here for more information.
Abstaining from ejaculation and touching is very difficult for most men. It takes a tremendous amount of discipline for a man to abstain from touching and pleasuring himself daily or even several times per day. Remember, sex (and this includes masturbation) is supposed to be about fun, relaxation, and pleasure. Routine masturbation will desensitize the penis and make the mind expect very frequent touching and sexual gratification. There's no reason to stress out over it. The process below can really spice up sexual relationships when done with a partner and rekindle relationships that have been hurt by the inability to reach orgasm. This will be difficult or impossible without a partner so ensure that you have someone trusted and supporting that can work with you through this process.
Basic principles:
- Take a break and build up a burning desire for stimulation.
- Make time, then take your time.
- Experiment with losing control over orgasms. Partner play.
- Focus on subtle sensations. Be gentle.
- Go for quality over frequency until you regain sensitivity.
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Do not “jerk off”. Take your time, use a personal lubricant, use a loose grip, and be gentle. He has bad habits so do not let him pleasure himself, do it for him. Slow gentle strokes that mimic the feelings that would occur during sex.
Emma, I have a suggestion. I think the frenulum area of his penis is a great place to stimulate! I think at first, any grip similar to his, even performed gently should be avoided.
Lubricate the underside of his penis close to the head, and the area of the head around the urethra. Also lubricate your first and second finger on one hand and grasp his penis with the other. Gently rub the frenulum area in short, quick, “up and down” strokes with the lubed fingers. You should be stroking from shaft to head and back, with both fingers contacting the frenulum, in a a range of only about an inch or a little more. This is a very sensitive area that is frequently not well stimulated by masturbation. Therefore, it is not typically a desensitized area.
This is a great way to stimulate him to orgasm without involving the desensitized area of his penis.
[…] conditioning that he has done to himself. It sounds like your guy is experiencing symptoms of delayed ejaculation. In a blog that I wrote last year, I discussed some ways to overcome the conditioning that he has […]
Firstly, I’m self locked for past 9 yrs, and though my ex and a couple others are helping me, it is my decision. When I go out, I’m either tucked or locked. 9 yrs ago it was for my then gf, now it’s helping make rational decisions without “him”. Honestly, I’d have done this when I was 16, but I was focus’d on castration and internet wasnt a thing…
at 20 – 23, premature ejaculation was not an issue, 3x a day I was self managing, if I wasn’t with someones wife, (with his consent, usually). thing was, I could last, tease her until she finished, and stop without having to. now I could quickly take care of myself, but using sex to finish was, difficult. I learned it was 3 fold, I preferred much rougher & tighter, I was taking asthma and hayfever drugs, and further desensitized when focusing on her pleasure.
cut to 49, and although I can “goon” for over an hour, I can still get the job done in under five minutes if I have something else scheduled. And with cuckold and sissy joi, it can be much less. But for me, it’s never been premature, it’s been surprising, or effecient.
[…] like to thank Meagan for sharing her story with us about her journey and struggle with delayed ejaculation. Together with her husband Mark, they brought their sex life back under their own […]