I’d like to thank Meagan for sharing her story with us about her journey and struggle with delayed ejaculation. Together with her husband Mark, they brought their sex life back under their own control.
I used to think our sex life was just going through a phase—like a dry spell that we’d eventually snap out of. But as time went on, it became clear that it wasn’t just a phase; it was something deeper, something that was eating away at me from the inside. Mark, my husband, had this thing with delayed ejaculation. At first, it didn’t really bother me; in fact, I kind of liked how long we could go. But eventually, what started as exciting marathons became exhausting, and not in a good way.
It got to the point where I started dreading sex. I never thought I’d say that—I mean, who dreads sex with their husband, right? But I did. Every time we got into bed, I’d have this sinking feeling like, “Here we go again…how long is this going to take?” I felt terrible even thinking that way. It wasn’t Mark’s fault, and I knew he wasn’t doing it on purpose. But every time it took forever for him to finish, I couldn’t help but feel this mix of frustration and doubt.
I started to wonder if I was the problem. Was I not sexy enough? Not good enough in bed? Maybe there was something wrong with me that was turning him off. These thoughts would spiral in my head, and before I knew it, I was in this dark place where sex became more about performance and less about connection. I tried to spice things up—new lingerie, sexy talk, you name it—but nothing seemed to make a difference. The more I tried, the more I felt like I was failing.
Mark could tell I was getting frustrated. He’d always apologize afterward, telling me how much he loved me and how it wasn’t my fault. But those apologies just made me feel worse, like I was some sort of cold-hearted bitch for not being more understanding. I hated that I was resenting him, resenting us, but I couldn’t seem to shake it.
It wasn’t just the sex that was suffering; our whole relationship was feeling the strain. I started avoiding intimacy altogether—coming up with excuses, staying up late so I’d be too tired, you name it. But deep down, I missed the connection we used to have. I missed feeling desired, feeling sexy, feeling… like I was enough.
One night, after yet another failed attempt at sex, I broke down. I told Mark how I was feeling—all of it. How I was starting to resent our sex life, how I felt like I wasn’t enough for him, and how I didn’t know what to do to fix it. I expected him to be hurt, maybe even angry, but instead, he just listened. And when I was done, he pulled me close and told me that he was sorry—that he never wanted me to feel like I wasn’t enough because, to him, I was everything.
That conversation changed something in me. It was like a switch flipped. I realized that I had been internalizing all this anger and frustration, turning it inward, when really, it wasn’t about me not being enough. It was about how we could turn this challenge into something that could bring us closer.
I started thinking about how we could play with these feelings in a way that would be empowering for both of us. The idea of humiliation had always intrigued me, but I’d never seriously considered it before because it seemed so mean and out of character. But the more I thought about it, the more it made sense. What if I could channel all that frustration into something sexual, something that made me feel powerful instead of defeated?
I brought it up to Mark, and to my surprise, he was open to it. We started slowly, experimenting with dirty talk that played on the idea of me being in control, of him being at my mercy. It was like rediscovering a part of myself that I didn’t even know was there. The first time I told him how much better I could do, how he wasn’t man enough for me, I expected him to be hurt or upset. But instead, he got turned on—really turned on. Seeing his reaction gave me this rush of confidence, like, “Hell yeah, I am enough. More than enough.”
We started pushing the boundaries further, incorporating fantasies where I would tell him about other men—how much better they were in bed, how much more satisfying they could be. It wasn’t about actually wanting to be with someone else; it was about taking all those feelings of inadequacy and flipping them on their head. I wasn’t the one who wasn’t enough; he was. And that role reversal was insanely liberating.
As we got deeper into it, I noticed a change in how I felt about our sex life. I wasn’t dreading it anymore; I was looking forward to it. I was excited to see how far we could go, how much more we could explore. The power dynamics had shifted, and with it, so had my confidence. I felt sexy, desirable, and completely in control.
Mark thrived in this new dynamic too. He loved how I took charge, how I wasn’t afraid to tell him exactly what I wanted and needed. Our sessions became less about him finishing and more about me getting what I wanted. And the more I got into it, the more he did too.
One night, we took it a step further. I told him I wanted to watch him touch himself while I talked about how much better it would be with someone else. The thought of it made me feel powerful, like I was holding all the cards. He was hesitant at first, but as soon as we got started, the look in his eyes told me everything I needed to know. He was loving it.
As I watched him, I could feel my own arousal building. I teased him, told him how much I deserved better, how he was lucky to even be allowed to touch himself in front of me. The words flowed out of me naturally, like I’d been holding them back for years. It was so empowering and when he finally came, it wasn’t just a release for him—it was a release for me too. All that pent-up frustration, all those feelings of inadequacy, just melted away.
After that night, things just kept getting better. We started incorporating more elements of humiliation and cuckolding into our sex life, and every time we did, I felt more and more in control. It wasn’t just about the sex anymore; it was about reclaiming my confidence, about taking back the power I’d lost somewhere along the way.
Now, our relationship is stronger than ever. We’ve found this balance where we can play with these dynamics in a way that’s healthy and satisfying for both of us. I don’t resent sex anymore—in fact, I crave it. I crave that feeling of power, of being the one in control, of knowing that I am more than enough.
And the best part? Mark loves it too. He loves seeing me so confident, so empowered. He loves being able to please me in a way that goes beyond just physical satisfaction. We’ve created this space where we can be completely honest with each other about what we want and need, without any judgment or shame. It’s opened up a whole new world for us, one where we can explore, experiment, and most importantly, enjoy each other in a way we never could before.
While we don’t go outside our relationship for sexual partners, it is something we may explore in the future. We simply don’t need it yet, we have our fantasy dynamic and I love the power and control that I’ve never before associated with sex. Sex has always been a source of submission but now it is a source of empowerment and dominance and these new feelings are quite exciting and addicting.
So yeah, it’s been a journey—a journey from resentment and frustration to empowerment and satisfaction. And I wouldn’t trade it for anything. Because now, I know that I am more than enough. And so is he.
Thanks for reading, please comment below!
