So nice to have found this forum.
Been into retention for 25 years or so. Kinda stumbled across it out of curiosity. Basically I have a pretty strong drop after O's which lead me to experiment with sex without O's. My first wife was not at all into it. Thought it was weird. Maybe I lacked the ability to bring her along, maybe it was her, but at the end of the day, while we are still friends, that relationship ended.
I remarried a while later and my second wife was all about it, which led to experimenting with imbalanced power dynamics which combined with long term O control, was a real growth experience. I say was because my second wife passed 3 years ago from cancer. Yup, that sucked more than I can say. She was an amazing woman. I 'm super grateful to have been able to share part of my life with her.
I find it sad power dynamics and retention is so fringe. I think so many relationships fail precisely because these things are not better understood.
Anyways, thanks to all who share on this forum. Makes a positive difference in the world. And thank you Emma for hosting it 🙂
I’m so sorry to hear about the loss of your wife. In my limited experience three years is a long time to be without and not enough time to recover, especially if you two had something precious and rare which is not readily accepted. I appreciate your writing in about this loss and about the positive aspects of being chaste or in retention.