In search of

Hello Yukari and welcome!

Finding a woman with an open and analytical mind that is not set in traditional sexual roles is going to be difficult. We are told from the very beginning how we should behave and those behaviors are modeled by our parents during our formative years. The important thing is to ask questions that show her you genuinely care about the responses to the questions that you are asking. When you are getting to know someone, always ask questions that will lead to positive conversation. Don't ask about things that will make her sad. Here are some examples:

• Tell me about your favorite vacation.
• What do you like most about yourself?
• What is your favorite movie?
• Do you have any secret talents that I should know about?
• What is the most valuable thing in your life?
• How would your best friends describe you?

With regard to understanding dominance and submission, work those into the conversation when you can. Please don't ask sexual questions too early, I think most women are sapiosexuals to some extent and need to know that you are more than a walking set of testicles. I have no interest in a guy who can't carry an intelligent conversation and I need some sort of mental connection if even for a fling. I hope that helps and you are correct, this is not a dating site but I hope we can give you some perspective that will help you find what you are looking for when dating. Find a connection first and work on understanding the sexual dynamic later. 

Anyone else have dating thoughts?

Extremely well said Emma.  My advice was going to be the same....just not nearly as eloquent.