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Pancake
(@pancake)
Active Member

Hello I am new on the site my husband I think is addicted though. I always see your site in one of his browser windows/tabs. Its not like he hides it though, he sends me some of your blogs sometimes and I we do chastity off and on but not a certain schedule. I needed to reach out and ask some questions since I may not be fully understanding. I get it, when I lock him up and take the keys I am taking some sort of freedom from him. He is giving me part of himself and that makes me feel good. It was exciting to share with him especially at first.

Sexually though it doesn't really turn me on so I wonder if I might be missing something. I like having the keys, it makes me feel perhaps powerful or a certain amount of control. When he is locked, tasks around the house magically get done, chores are complete. It is as if he has extra energy or motivation and he directs that toward me and that I absolutely see. When I tease him, grab his crotch and generally make his lockup time very uncomfortable things get done even quicker and his extra energy and attention becomes even more focused on me

I guess my question is I just don't find any sexual arousal from the cage itself. Just his actions and how he treats me when he is locked up. It is like if I wore a certain necklace or earrings and was seemingly a more devoted wife when I did so. He may like the earrings but they might not be so sextually stimulating. I do like the way the cage looks and it makes me smile to brush past it and have this little secret. I don't dislike it by any means but I don't find it necessarily arousing.

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Topic starter Posted : 31/05/2021 11:06 am
Brian liked
Pancake
(@pancake)
Active Member

I am sure he will read this so I am not going to give specifics like our ages or how long we've been experimenting with it. Too many details.

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Topic starter Posted : 31/05/2021 11:07 am
Brian liked
Emma
 Emma
(@evolvingyourman_ivcr4j)
Member Admin

Welcome to the site!

I love that your husband is addicted and even better that you've both cultivated a relationship where he feels comfortable communicating openly with you and sharing blogs (Yay!). I have to agree with your take on chastity. I don't find the cage attractive but his actions of wearing the cage FOR me are meaningful and I take it as a loving gesture. An act of love and service to me and my emotional needs. The gestures of love and devotion are what I find attractive. His behavior while he is locked are what I find attractive. The cage is neat and I enjoy looking at it like jewelry but it doesn't instantly make me aroused or anything of the sort. 

 

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Posted : 31/05/2021 12:41 pm
Brian, Nika and liked
Pancake
(@pancake)
Active Member

Thank you. At least I am not crazy. I thought I was supposed to find the cage sexy but I was like um. not really. 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣 

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Topic starter Posted : 31/05/2021 3:40 pm
Brian liked
Nika
 Nika
(@nika)
Estimable Member

@pancake

The cage itself isn't aesthetically pleasing. For me its a symbol. A symbol of ownership. A sense of 'power' over his most burning desires. Its a symbol of your dominance and his submissiveness. Its difficult to explain. As feelings usually are. You'll be his "Pancake" forever and he won't want another "Pancake" for the rest of his life. 😀 

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Posted : 31/05/2021 11:44 pm
Pancake
(@pancake)
Active Member

@nika Thank you that is what I am starting to get. There is a learning curve but what I am learning is the point isn't the cage its the effect of the cage. Also thanks to whoever @emma ? added a pancake picture for me. its cute.

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Topic starter Posted : 01/06/2021 8:25 am
Nika
 Nika
(@nika)
Estimable Member

@pancake

Well, you have a long journey ahead of you. Congrats! 😀 

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Posted : 01/06/2021 8:31 am
true42
(@true42)
Trusted Member
Posted by: @pancake

Thank you. At least I am not crazy. I thought I was supposed to find the cage sexy but I was like um. not really. 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣 

It's your call. If it's not sexy, then it's not sexy. My wife doesn't care for it, either, although she appreciates the results. A few days in (like today, for example), and I'm completely putty-in-her-hands, following her every word and movement like a good little puppy.

And up until a-few-days-in, I am willing to do (and to do happily, and respectfully, and lovingly) whatever it takes to get "back there", because being putty-in-her-hands is pure bliss.

The battle is long over. She won. And it wasn't even a close battle, because apparently I was fighting on her side. And for the rest of our days, I will gladly be, and act, and do, however/whatever it is that she desires. The cage is just her tool to use in the process, however she chooses to.

I'm still learning (e.g. I really upset her, quite accidentally, just a few days ago, by doing some chores that she wanted to do herself), but I'm a motivated learner, and desperate to ace this class.

I'm not a slave. It's just that she's trained me (or helped me to train myself) very well to be happiest when I am doing exactly what she wants, and I feel completely dejected any time I fail in any way to do so. There's just nothing in the world that compares to the joy I get from pleasing my wife, and nothing more gutting than failing to do so. So I always obey, completely, because it brings me immense joy, and I happen to like joy. The end.

Now you get to write your own story with your husband. How fun is that going to be!

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Posted : 07/06/2021 4:14 pm
Brian liked

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