Pegging is a sexual act where the female partner is penetrative to the man. Depending on your belief of the role of the male and female body during sex, you can attach the term masculine or feminine to it. The term masculinity is incredibly subjective in and of itself. Masculinity or manhood is defined as a set of behaviors, attributes and roles that are associated with men and boys. Femininity is the inverse, a set of characteristics associated with women and girls.
Do you attach masculinity to the idea of dominance and leadership? If so, I carry the masculine role in the relationship that I have with my fiancé. Do you attach cleaning, childcare and laundry with femininity? If so, you are not only incredibly sexist but you are probably the same guy who buys your wife a vacuum for her birthday. My point is that your definition of gender roles and the flexibility that you allow for those roles is deeply personal. So is your attachment to the importance of those roles. How much value and importance do you put on your partner acting their gender role?
I can’t speak for you so I’ll speak for me. You may not agree with my view and that’s just fine. I find gender roles to be guidelines. I want my fiancé to fall within the general guidelines of what society determines to be masculine? Is this because I am a proponent of society’s rules about gender? Not really, I simply find many masculine traits to be sexy. There are many masculine traits that I find to be absolute turn offs.
I don’t dig cross dressing. A man in frilly panties doesn’t do anything for me but I understand the male need to feel sexy. My personal opinion is that male sexiness comes from the appreciation of masculine attributes but I also understand that some men feel a deep sense of sexy when they feel appreciated for their femininity.
I fucked her. She fucked him. Which of those do you feel most comfortable with. Does a girl typically do sex to the guy or does the guy do sex to the girl? Do you enjoy being small and comforted? Do you enjoy being large and comforting? How do the terms “Male Femininity” or “Female Masculinity” make you feel? Ask a trans person and you might get an entirely different but vastly more enlightened view of gender and sexuality.
What if pegging has no relation to gender whatsoever? Can pegging simply be an activity that a couple does to allow them to experience the entire swath of sexual pleasure? Why does it need to mean something more than it is? Pegging is what you make of it. If he enjoys being pegged, does that make him bi or gay? If she enjoys pegging, does that make her bi or gay?
Love each other, be good to each other and make each other happy. Don’t dwell unnecessarily on some sort of deeper meaning that pegging doesn’t need to carry. Gender play is an entirely different thing and it can absolutely be separated from pegging.
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I don’t think we look at pegging as masculine or feminine. We look at it as a way to bring us closer together. For us to switch roles and experience sex for the others point of view. I would definitely say it has brought us closer together.
I think this is the right way to see it. Intimacy shouldn’t be gendered.
Pegging is the physical act of a girl using a strapon to have sex is a man’s bum, in my views it’s amazing and feels so amazing.
Being gay/bi is being attracted to people of the same gender.
The two are in no way linked.
There is also no link, for me, to switching gender roles or giving “power” to my wife, it’s an equal relationship when we peg. She enjoys it and I enjoy it, it’s just that simple.
I feel we are closer because we have both opened up about what like, being honest builds closeness.
Having to hold back parts of you, increases distance.
I suggest, if you’d like to try something, say so. The worst that can happen is the other person says no.
My wife asked me to cum in her face, I said no, but that honesty made me feel closer to her. There was no problem with saying no, consent is 2 ways.
But knowing things she likes helps me understand her more.
That sounds like a very healthy approach to pegging! Love it.
Emma, this was another interesting and thought provoking post. Thank you.
The assertion that associating childcare with feminine is sexist made me think of a situation in Florida back in 2016. There was pending legislation to make shared parenting vice sole custody the norm post divorce. At the time, a preeminent feminist organization in the US, the National Association of Women, fought against the legislation and the Florida Governor ultimately vetoed the bill.
https://familyblog.legalmatch.com/2016/04/will-florida-parents-get-equal-custody-rights.html
My take away at the time was that it was a good example of why being feminist is not the same as being egalitarian.
Funny, I was just reading something about that when I was writing this blog. You read through your screen and into my brain.
Pegging certainly isn’t gender specific, and can be so many things, from intimacy to punishment. It all depends on both people.
It really can but at the end of the day it makes me feel empowered and “in charge” and that implies some sort of power play which implies that the penetrator is the one with the sexual power. At least in my mind, with my interpretation. Wouldn’t you think?
Interesting topic that reminds me of experiences with my wife. When she was on top and very much in charge of the motions, there were times when I felt she was really “fucking” me even though I was the one with the penis. I would try to remain motionless so she could grind her clit better against my pubic bone and be in control. It often felt like we shared my phallus. The way the penis is rooted in the male, manipulated in this way gave me the sensation she was penetrating me.
When younger, I was always very impressed by my girlfriends interests in “dry humping.” Very much the actions and motions of penetration. My impression has been that the motions of both men and women in intercourse are very similar.
Anal sex is something men need to experience to develop a better understanding and empathy for the partners they penetrate. It is fun to do on both ends, so to speak. On another site, someone mentioned using a double ended dildo, both anally. Bucket list addition.
Yeah I honestly hate how many people refer to the woman pegging the guys as the man in the relationship and him as the woman. Like, I am still a feminine loving woman, and he is still a masculine loving man. If you think that masculinity is only dominance and femininity is submissiveness then you are sexist. I dont peg my boyfriend regularly, we only did it few times some far, but when we do he is the man, and I am the woman and he gets to experience being vulnerable and fucked.
” ….. he gets to experience being vulnerable and fucked.” Such a wonderful feeling!
It’s both and it’s neither. It’s what you make it out to be. One thing it is an intimate expression of intimate loving sex. Yummy.
Have you found any connection between women who have a dominant personality but for whatever reason don’t get to live in a way that suits them and their desire for pegging? Maybe they enjoy it because they have to live a more passive way of being in their day to day and get to let their true self come out? Or is it the opposite where pegging is just an extension of the assertive way that they are on a daily basis? Would a female mayor of a city who is dominant and a leader in her everyday life be more likely to want to peg her husband or less? Would a women who has the personality of a leadership role but has to work as a flight attendant or something be more likely to want to come home and peg her husband because it allows her to experience who she wants to be?