I am interested in hearing about were chastity and Male retention started for you. As one of the more rare cases of the female taking initiative I am curious about thoughts and emotions that went in to the process.
For some of the other women here, do you remember how it felt during the initial stages of chastity? What was your reaction to him asking, or his to your insistence? What came easy to you and what was difficult? Did it make sense or were was their doubt?
Deep question I know, and far into the past for some. Any information would be appreciated.
For my part, it was my husband who first put the file on the table. Although I've always been the authority figure in our relationship, I never really thought about male chastity until he brought the idea up.
I remember listening carefully to his plea for chastity and explaining to myself why it would be a good thing for our couple, who at that time were going through a difficult situation. However, I took the time to think about it, to learn about the subject properly on "serious" sites before agreeing to try the experiment.
It took us a time of adaptation so that each of us could find our marks in this new configuration because once the stage of fantasy is over, it is time to really assume things.
After a few weeks we also established rules to facilitate communication and that some subjects do not always run in a loop (the first one being the recurring question of, when will I have my next orgasm?).
Finally we had to adapt our lifestyle. Chastity is a change for the caged man, but also (and we say it less) for the keyholder. Because, from my point of view, in order for this kind of relationship to work it is necessary to maintain a frequent sexual tension so that the interest of the caged man doesn't fall back. So goodbye pajamas, we review our wardrobe, we exceed certain limits and we break some taboos.
I'm not going to lie, it took us a few months to find our cruising speed, but today I don't regret anything.
Thanks for the response, I appreciate the insight. Apologies for the delayed response.
Your start sounds remarkably similar to ours. My wife has always been the more assertive person in our relationship. I too brought the idea to my wife, it sounds like I did a worse job explaining it than your husband did. We had a much rockier start to the fantasy phase, she was doing it more for me than because she was interested. She was not interested doing much of her own research on the topic and it fell by the wayside for a bit.
Since we have reintroduced chastity into our life things have been different because of the level of communication and openness that we be able to maintain. I did a better job of explaining why it mattered to me, and why I felt the need to give her the control. For her part made it clear that it was not an option but an expectation that I stay locked for her. She also confided that she missed the feeling of control that it brought.
Both of us have begun to change in many ways. I think that she feels more confident and emboldened by the shift in power because it is more real to her now. She has seen results she enjoys, that I also enjoy those results and that it has been more beneficial to our relationship. Adding chastity to our lives has been had better results than friends going through marriage counseling. And only at the cost of some plastic, metal and a few years.
You know it's a good deal when both parties walk away thinking they have the better end.