Here’s an email exchange with a reader over the last couple days:
Reader– We have a somewhat female led relationship and my husband wears a chastity cage regularly, we do pegging somewhat regularly, is the next step cross-dressing?
Emma– Has he expressed interest in cross dressing?
Reader– Well no but I’ve watched some of the porn and female led relationship websites and it seems like that that is the next step.
Emma– Ah I see. As with your relationship, everyone and everything is different. If your husband wants to cross dress, more power to him. If he wants to skydive, more power to him. Many of the female led relationship material that you read is male based fantasy and isn’t a reliable source of information. The ONLY reliable source for information about your relationship than talking to your partner.
There are tons of things on the sexual spectrum and absolutely zero of them are linked to one another. Does he like pegging? Does he like waffles? Which sports team does he like? None of these things are related unless you make them related.
A man who likes chastity or pegging isn’t necessarily a feminine guy. He could be. He could be craving a transition to transgender. Maybe not. Anybody that you see on the street could be coping with their gender or assigned sexuality.
The vast majority of couples who enjoy pegging and/or chastity simply do it because it suits their relationship. Some couples tumble down a rabbit hole of fetish like Kevin and I did with our foray into the whole discipline side of things. We then decided it wasn’t for us and took a path back to the more vanilla approach that suits our relationship. Your rabbit hole may be forced feminization, sissification, diapers or puppy play. If any of those things work for the two of you, there’s nothing absolutely nothing wrong with it. Do what makes you happy.
Sometimes exploration is required for us to understand our likes and dislikes and that is totally fine. I went through an exploratory phase with women because I absolutely love the female form but I didn’t enjoy the anatomy that accompanied. Does that make me a lesbian? Hardly.
Some, such as Dan Savage have even suggested that kink is a sexual orientation. One survey from the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom found that 35 percent of BDSM practitioners are bisexual.
Depending on the type of kink you are into, I’d suggest that you are more in-touch with your sexuality and open to trying new things than the normies that walk among us. We are all individual humans and we are all learning up until the day we die. If you stop learning, you might as well be dead inside anyway.